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Mental Wellness, the Cognitive Triangle

One of the most common complaints I hear from clients is about anxiety. Predominately this condition is produced by the individual themselves, via their thoughts. Usually the thoughts are racing ahead to the future and fearsome (notice we have another feeling here) of what that unknown future will offer. Ugh! Worrying constantly about the future can be very tiresome if not overwhelming!

The first section of this discussion will be about the Cognitive Triangle. To organize the Triangle, put Thoughts at the top (their are the 'mastermind' of the body) and Feelings on the lower left and Behaviors/Actions on the lower right. They all interact. We want to work on becoming more conscious of each.

If we have a negative Behavior we want to stop, we need to discover what Feeling we had prior to the behavior and then what Thoughts we had that created the feeling. By discovering the thinking pattern and changing it, we can modify our feelings and ultimately our behaviors.


When we are in denial of Thoughts or Feelings, we compound the build up of tension from unresolved feelings. Over time this buildup becomes excessive or overwhelming and typically a negative Behavior is then exhibited. Denied Feelings can lead to a build up of many others, so work on them and don't procrastinate.

An example is unresolved anger becomes what? Bitterness. Think of the sentence we normally use "bitterness" in: He/She is just a bitter old person! Notice the word "old", we don't typically use it with young people. Not: "Why sonny, she is just a bitter youngin'!" Not! Angry youngin' maybe but not bitter! Time doesn't evaporate Feelings but allows them to stew inside. Undealt with, they began to ooze out in forms of: isolation, aggression, passiveness, lethargy, snideness (snarky), criticalness, suicidal, and many others.

If you have gotten to this stage, contact me or any professional for help to begin working toward a healthier you.




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